Tokyo, Procrastination
screw that!
Published on September 25, 2006 By momijiki In Personal Relationships
Although my husband does a lot to help me, there are some pretty primo instances where I get the message that I am unimportant. Particularly when it comes to immigration issues.

I'm not even going to start into the green card application process he delayed on. I can't really speak about it without becoming bitter.

But this month my spousal visa is up for renewal. For once in my life, I wanted to do all my application stuff with PLENTY of time. In the beginning of the month I went to get some of my documents started. Found out that I have to get documents from my husband first. These are documents he can only get when he shows up at city hall. I did all the research and fact gathering and found the phone numbers. Maybe there is an easier way, but we don't have the ex-pat package to take care of us so we are on our own.

I think I told him the wrong expirary date, but it is pretty much immaterial. I told him that if he could get every thing done the week of September 7 while I was away, that we would have plenty of time. He said, "Sure! No problem. I'll be able to get that done for you really easily."

I thought,, "Perfect! For once I'm not going to have to scramble!" Why did I think that?

I came back from my trip and he hadn't gotten any of the documents. The next week was super busy for him and he couldn't take time off work. Then after badgering him I finally get him to go and then he finds out that one of the documents has to come from Osaka. But now time is critical. He has to get things done by special delivery. (WHich is wierd because he told me one has to get all these documents in person so WHAT is he on about?????)

Turns out, one of my documents expires before the others and I thought they expired at the same time. My visa expired so now I have to hope that my document from Osaka comes by tomorrow so we can BOTH go to the immigration office. He can make the official apology.

As long as my renewal is a rubber stamp, no problem. THen I can go get a driver's license. Which expires Friday.

Basically, it only seems like he wants to help me when it is interesting to him or makes him look good in some way. I guess making sure that I can live in the same country as him is a pretty low priority.

?Right now I really want to give that boy a smack with a large-size tuna. Grrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Comments
on Sep 25, 2006
I wish you luch with the mail. I would like to hear how things turn out.
on Sep 25, 2006

HOw about a smack with a Mackeral blessed by a priest?

Hope all goes well.

on Sep 25, 2006
Husband's can be annoying. My husband expects me to drop everything when he needs something but is the favor returned - not usually. Of course, i'm not in danger of being kicked out of the country if I don't get my stuff done. I hope you get everything squared away.
on Sep 25, 2006
Thanks for the well wishes.

Mackeral blessed by a priest


If only I could find a Shinto blessed tuna... Hey, maybe if I go to a newly opened sushi restaurant! I'll have to investigate that one. I think I might have actually seen one blessed on TV.
on Sep 25, 2006
*smack husband round the head and kicks his butt into touch*

Men! They can never get their priorities right!

Good luck I hope it all works out fo you.
on Sep 25, 2006

Men! They can never get their priorities right!

Sure they can jennifer,  IF it's about them...

best wishes for you momijiki

on Sep 25, 2006
Sure they can jennifer, IF it's about them


this is true!
on Sep 26, 2006
I'm still waiting for my document to arrive. It would have been better if it arrived yesterday. I'm trying to be optimistic so maybe lots of people get the dates screwed up.

The thing that irritates me is that my husband still insists he did the best he could. I'd just like him to admit that he screwed up. It won't make things better per se but it is really annoying to hear him defend his goof. He actually told me that I should have "chased him more" to get it done. Ummm... honey? I did. I talked with you about this the night before I went away and then called you the next day to ask you about it?

The funny thing was that he said it was going to be no problem. Urf. I guess it's kinda like one of those horror movies where whoever says, "I'll be right back" is the first to die.
on Sep 26, 2006
My husband expects me to drop everything when he needs something but is the favor returned - not usually.


I know what you mean here. I have to give my husband credit though. He has been helpful with a lot of stuff and is actually quite good to me. But sometimes these important things really take up a lot of my awareness.

He is letting me grumble and make comments (and I am reining in a bit) but without saying anything.
on Sep 27, 2006
I hope the documents come through by now. I know how frustrating that can be. My brother went through the same thing with his wife. He was quick on the uptake did all the leg work that he could do, until it was her turn to do her part, she sat on it and he faced the same situation as you. Thankfully now he's a resident here in the US. He's going to apply for his citizienship soon. I really hope everything works in your favor.

Oh, the thing with husbands, as you should know, it doesn't matter how much you talk to them, or remind them, they never hear anything!
on Sep 28, 2006
Oh, the thing with husbands, as you should know, it doesn't matter how much you talk to them, or remind them, they never hear anything!


lol I was talking to my mom about this and she said the same thing. She also reminded me that I can feel like he doesn't care but that doesn't mean it's true. I realize that but I was definitely dwelling on the negative.

Re: my documents:
I handed them all in and hubby came with me. We sat there with heaps of other people. None of the immigration people freaked. I guess they see this all the time. We had to provide a written explanation of why we didn't get it done on time. I was laughing at husband that he did NOT write "because we are idiots."

I will find out in about two weeks if I get all the documents approved or not. Seems pretty likely that we will and I get a new seal in my passport. I don't think we have to do another interview.

I completely missed the window to get my license. Partly my fault for sitting on it too long. Then again, I thought I had another 6 days to get it done. I can't get the license without the seal.

So now I will try getting my driver's license the Japanese drivers' route. Learner's permit et al. I will have to go to police's drivers' lecture in Japanese and then find someone who will lend me a car to practice driving. Unless I have to get an official driving instructor to complete my 10 hours. It'll cost a couple hundred. Not thrilled. But it is cheaper than the 1-2 thousand that it costs if I have to go to the driving school.

Anyway, things have settled down a bit. We are getting along, but I notice more grey hairs. Coincidence?

I think NOT!
on Oct 03, 2006
I will find out in about two weeks if I get all the documents approved or not. Seems pretty likely that we will and I get a new seal in my passport. I don't think we have to do another interview.


THis is good!


So now I will try getting my driver's license the Japanese drivers' route. Learner's permit et al. I will have to go to police's drivers' lecture in Japanese and then find someone who will lend me a car to practice driving. Unless I have to get an official driving instructor to complete my 10 hours. It'll cost a couple hundred. Not thrilled. But it is cheaper than the 1-2 thousand that it costs if I have to go to the driving school.


Good luck with this!

Anyway, things have settled down a bit. We are getting along, but I notice more grey hairs. Coincidence? I think NOT!


Haha